We cannot transition from the life we lived before recovery to our new life without grieving what we have left behind. No matter how great new life looks in comparison to our old, we still need to grieve for what we’ve given up in that old life. Jesus is the wise counselor and knew this when He said, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” Because Jesus knows how we think, He knows that we cannot move into our new lives without allowing ourselves to grieve what we’ve lost.
Grieving is not something to be avoided. In order to transition from one stage of living to the next, we must evaluate the stage we are leaving and process what has happened. When we don’t give ourselves the time to do this, we end up stuck in unresolved feelings such as anger, sadness, resentment. It’s especially important to grieve those old stages that had disappointment and pain so that we can learn how to cope with these emotions in the future. Grieving allows us the opportunity to let go of what is dead in order to take hold of what is alive.
Not everything that is healthy and helpful is going to feel good. We can’t rely on our feelings to get us from one stage in life to the next. Grieving is a natural and healthy way of fully engaging ourselves in our new lives. Recovery gives us an amazing tool to help with the grieving process called an inventory. The inventory can be found in Steps 4 and 5 of the 12 Steps. Christ understands our loss, abandonment, and pain. We have a savior who has experienced what we have gone through, and He is with us in every step of the grieving process.
Written by Jackell.