In recovery, we don’t offer suggestions, advise or any type of criticism unless first asked. To offer anything before being asked is a form of fixing and is very codependent behavior. In the past, we were very quick to offer unsolicited opinions and criticisms. In recovery, we trust that the Holy Spirit will heal each of us. We no longer have to be someone else’s Holy Spirit and try to fix them.
There is a God and we are not Him. Before coming into recovery for codependency, we would do everything we could to make those around us not feel anything painful. We attempted to be the God of good feelings and pleasant things. Our attempts at playing God usually failed and, most times, not only caused pain to continue, but also to get worse. When we played God, we got in the way of the Holy Spirt’s real healing and caused delays in the healing process.
It’s easy to criticize but difficult to come up with solutions. We are learning to allow others to go through their healing process with God, without our interference. There is a solution to all of life’s struggles. That solution does not involve any of us playing God or getting in the way of the Holy Spirit. We have come to understand that we can’t play God and be of service to God at the same time.
Written by Jackell.