C.S. Lewis said, “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” The reason why we can’t move forward is that we will not let go of the past. When something happens to us like trauma, abuse, loss, or abandonment, we become stuck by not allowing ourselves to let go. We become stuck at whatever age the incident happened because we don’t let go and move on.
Releasing the emotions and stepping forward are not easy things to do for many of us. We never learned the coping skills required for us to be able to let go. It’s a rare experience for anyone to grow up with good examples of how to handle emotions. Most of us learned ineffective methods, causing further problems in our lives. Hanging onto hurt and anger as the norm was the typical model in our formative years. We learned those behaviors, and grew into adulthood, not knowing how to let go.
In recovery, we discover a whole new way to live. Recovery is sometimes referred to as “the surrendered life,” thus becoming a whole new way of life. We learn that there is victory in surrender. When we hold onto our past, we become stuck and we lose. Letting go allows us to move forward and win. We learn to mourn what is dead and to celebrate the new life Christ has given us. We become unstuck, and we are free to live in this moment in which we are glorifying God.
Written by Jackell.