When we come into recovery, we find out some interesting things about ourselves. In recovery, we spend time in quiet reflection and, along the way, develop skills that enable us to be more insightful. One of the things most of us will discover is that we tend to beat ourselves up a lot. We are very critical of ourselves and judge ourselves harshly. When we are critical of ourselves, it’s like taking out a 2 by 4 and beating ourselves up with it.
In recovery, we learn to recognize our patterns of self-criticism. A good sponsor will help us to recognize when we are being overly critical of ourselves and the things that trigger our self-destructive patterns. We also learn that God does not want us to live a life of self-abuse through being overly critical. We learn how to pause and listen to God telling us “Stop beating yourself up. You are my precious child, and I love you.”
Our recovery calls for us to stop beating ourselves up. Sometimes we think we can continue to use the 2 by 4 if we cover it in velvet to soften the blows. We are so addicted to our behavior of being self-critical that we try to pad the blows in order to cause less damage. However, we aren’t really addressing the behavior. When we recognize the harm we are doing to ourselves, we become willing to look at the causes of this behavior. We also come to know that God does not want us to abuse His beloved child.
Written by Jackell.